Turns Out, My 90-Year-Old Self Knows More About Life Than I Do
Conversations with your future-self through guided meditation
I Met My 90-Year-Old Self.
We sat down on a bench together, and she reminisced about her life — the decisions she made and what brought her to where she is now. Of course, she was healthy, happy, and content. She had made all the right choices.
Before she left, she gave me one piece of advice: “You have achieved enough.”
I sat there, stunned. Not literally, but the mental image felt accurate.
I have achieved enough?
It was a statement that went against everything I told myself on a regular basis. And yet, it rang true.
Growing up, I was always striving to get better. To be better. Many of us are conditioned to believe that results bring us what we desire — praise, attention, compliments, presents, a hug. We learn, over time, that in order to satisfy our needs, we have to be successful in one way or another.
Looking back, I can see this clearly. My self-worth became tied to my output. What I did mattered more to me than what I already was.
You can imagine the challenges that come with that.
What happens when you're struggling and not an A-star student?
What happens when you fail, even though you gave it your all?
What happens when there are always more goals to reach, and the top keeps moving higher?
You can never do enough, and therefore, you will never be enough.
Entering the workforce only reinforced this mindset. Now, it wasn’t just about striving for attention, it was also about money. About building a better life. About gaining more. Making more. Being more.
I was surrounded by proud achievers, speaking about their work-induced burnouts like an exclusive club you had to enter in order to be more. In a strengths test at my first job, one of my top three results was “Achiever.” Seeing that result filled me with pride. It felt like confirmation that I could belong to this exclusive, successful group. After all, I wanted to achieve more, too.
Over the years, my outlook on life changed. I worked harder, achieved more, and sat in the shadows of the downsides of it all. I learned the hard way that the more, more, more cycle is never-ending; and it can bury you.
Working on myself and supporting others in their own journeys helped bring light into the darkness, highlighting the toxicity of a mindset I had honed for years. Recognition is the first step toward change. Actually changing, though, that takes time.
Then I met my 90-year-old self.
I love guided imagery exercises and regularly use them with my clients. Letting go of reality and fully embracing a scenario - sometimes fantastical - can do wonders for the senses. The chances of returning with an Aha-moment are higher than you might expect. Of course, it happened to me. In the most unimaginable way.
“You have achieved enough.”
I have always felt like I need to achieve more.
But my older self should know best, right? She’s from the future. She has gone through everything I have yet to experience. She has seen the outcomes of my choices. She knows what was worth it and what turned out even better than expected.
So her words - my words - made me pause. Made me really think.
I have achieved enough.
I worked hard and built a life for myself that couldn’t be further from where I started. I leveled up, fought my enemies (metaphorically), and feel equipped for whatever comes next.
I created things I’m proud of. I contributed things that have meaning.
Maybe my old self is right. Maybe that is enough.
Maybe it’s time to slow down, take a step back, and breathe. I want to celebrate how far I’ve come instead of chasing the next race. I want to embrace gratitude, to find contentment, to leave pressure behind. I don’t have to achieve more. I simply want to do things I enjoy, without analyzing success stories beforehand or setting impossibly high bars.
Of course, there will always be more to strive for. But just because it exists doesn’t mean I have to chase it.
Maybe this is the exact lesson I need to learn right now — that I can still have a thousand things I want to do, but I don’t need to let my subconscious follow my every step, rating my performance, nagging about imperfections, and rolling her eyes for not being better, faster, more.
Maybe recognizing that I have achieved enough is exactly what allows me to fully enjoy life.
If this resonates with you, share it with someone who needs to hear it. And tell me — what’s one thing you’re proud of achieving so far?
If you struggle with feeling like you need to do more to be enough, you’re not alone. This is something I help my clients navigate. If you’d like support in shifting your mindset, let’s talk.
That's such a great way to shift your own perspective. It deeply resonates with me, since I am on the same journey as you are. My mentees also love to do guided future meditations to get more in touch with their selfs who they want to be at heart.
I grew up with the mindset that my value was directly connected to how much I was doing. There was no time for rest. Rest meant lazy. This is something I've battled as an adult as well. Thank you for articulating it so well!